There are many factors that affect a mom’s health which contribute to early labor. But for me, sepsis or blood infection caused my baby to come out in seven months time. I never knew it and I could not imagine that it would happen to me, never in my entire life.

It was year 2001, before New Year comes; my pre-term baby was in an incubator at the NICU and I was lying down praying. I can't even sleep, I kept thinking on my baby's condition. I'd asked my hubby to assist me upon visiting my preemie at the NICU for the first time. I didn't know what a NICU looks like. I had a glimpse of my baby boy on a mirror wall. My eyes became teary and there was a mix of emotions that I can't control.

There was a moment of silence and a prayer when we decided to go inside the NICU for a closer look. With a head cap, mask and a hospital gown, the hospital aide told us to wash our hands first. My baby is about 14 inches long and 1.2 kilos in weight. Imagine that...with tubes in his mouth, hands and legs. The noise from the respirator makes me feel more nervous. I don't even hear him cry because of the tubes but I felt it, especially when he kicked with a flushing movement on his face.

"Hold on baby ..Hold on. You’re strong and brave". Those were the first words coming out of me as I caressed my baby's hands and feet. Holding my husband's hands made me stronger as the doctor tells us that our baby had weak lungs with pneumonia (an inflammatory illness of the lungs) and sepsis (the presence of a pus forming and other organisms in the blood or tissue). I myself need to be treated with antibiotics too and stay at the hospital for 3 days.

It was one of the saddest moments in my life when I got home without my little boy. I'd visited my son every day for 2 hours, to talk and to sing to him and bring him my breast milk.

"You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You never notice how much I love you; please don't take my sunshine away." The song I used to sing to my preemie.

After 12 days of tracheal intubations (placement of a plastic tube into the trachea for airway passage and ventilation), my baby could now breathe alone without any support. Thank God he was improving....

In one month's time, doctors found out that he had a hernia (the tissue of an organ bulges outward that causes a palpable lump on the lower abdominal extremities); my baby needed an operation. The success of the operation was in the hand of the surgeons. I am not with my preemie during the operation. I stayed home just praying, I believe that he can make it and God didn't fail me.

An unforgettable moment of our child's struggle at the NICU sticks on my mind until now, I even cry every time I remembered it. My baby was in the Well Baby Room, no more incubation, when he lost his breath with a very low pulse. Doctors tried to revive him earlier when I was not there yet and put him again in an incubator. I was not allowed to be with my baby, so I just stared at the mirror wall of an isolated room.

The nurses and doctors began to panic as they got my baby out of the incubator, trying to pump him using an oxygen mask, again he stopped breathing." What's happening! I want to be with my baby", tears falling from my eyes but they didn't allow me.

"Calm down, pray and God will save your son." A nun approached as she whispered the words to me. I felt I'm lost in an island, all alone....don't know what to do and helpless. I ran at the prayer room crying like a child.

"Please Lord; don't let my sunshine away from me." He relieves my sorrows as I talk to the Lord for an hour. The doctor assured me that my child was stable now; he needed to be incubated again with a respirator support back at the NICU. I should not worry...he has to undergone some medications. I can go home for a while.

God is good...another chance for a Christian...a chance to share the beautiful things in life ahead with his own family. Baby is stronger than I am. With all of the pains, he fights in order to live.

It was a very touching moment when they allow me to carry my son, having him breastfeed. Signs of improvement became fast and he even gained weight, but an optometrist had to check my son's eyes for problems regarding low vision.

Two months and ten days at the NICU, at last my preemie could go home at five pounds, he was ready to face life to the fullest, to play with his older brother and sleep with us.

Patience, Faith, Hope and Unconditional love, lessons I’ve learned making me stronger than I am before. Nothing is impossible with GOD…..

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