What, am I crazy? I've raised two amazing, wonderful kids, been an internationally published writer, and now I'm going back to Nursery School? What gives?
Did you ever just want to chuck everything and run away? Far away to a distant land to start over?
Well, my husband and I recently did just that, both of us leaving lucrative positions in New York. Well, Lew left a lucrative position in New York (he was a New York Times editor) and me, being a freelancer put me on par with a poverty-level income. Not so lucrative. But the perks were fantastic! Spa trips, travel, the Whole Big. Until it got tedious and exhausting and ultimately, simply not worth it.
But hey, you make your choices, and you learn to live with them.
Or not.
Which is why, after much debate (well, some debate) about fleeing the East Coast for parts West, we did just that. Ditched the East to "find" ourselves" in the desert. And along the way, I realized I was toast.
As in, really, really burned out from years of writing and dealing with unpleasant (some were ok) PRINT editors.
FYI, the particular editor of THIS site is a rarity--a woman who knows of what I speak (and write) and actually gets my wacko sense of humor and perspective. So everyone give Kelby a round of applause and a couple of "whoo-whoo"s. Thank you.
But I just got fed up with the endless bickering with editors, dealing with uncooperative sources (not to mention nefarious predators out there in the publishing world) and decided to chuck it.
Call it "midlife crisis," call it Major Career Change. But after reading and thinking and crying and all that good emotional stuff we usually bottle up inside ourselves, I decided to try something completely different and out of my (I really hate this term, so sorry in advance) "comfort zone."
I tried mentally going way back in my life, to conjure up what I truly enjoyed and had passion for, prior to my journalism career grabbed me like a barnacle.
And what kept resurfacing were the times I spent volunteering at various low-income nursery school programs, including Get Set, the precursor to Head Start. For which I also volunteered. And the crazy happiness I felt helping my New York neighbor with her baby Olivia, for whom I "nannied" for her mom who was between nannies at the time.
It's the children that gave me joy. Those little faces, those tender smiles and loving hugs, were what made me happy. So, the thunderbolt of awareness hit: Stop the treadmill of writing and do something joyful.
Which has lead me right back smack into toddlerhood.
I found this amazing, pro-play educational pre-school whose values mirrored my own about childhood education. That play is part of growth, brain development and imagination. It reminded me of the amazing pre-school I had sent my son Ben (now age, gulp, 23!) when he was a mere bit of a boy.
Ben went to a co-op with a playground beyond fantasy. With a real car in the yard to play in, a tricycle path that rivaled dirt-bike paths, a real boat in the yard, a garden, a playhouse. You name it, they had it and I loved being a class parent whenever possible. It was fun!
And the school I found here in Tucson mirrored that co-op and that was that. Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me back in.
Which is why this fall, after a few weeks of hands-on training, I will be joining the staff and "co-teaching" kindergarten-age kiddies. For the simple joy of childhood. Before public school drains creative play and the inevitable bursting of the toddler bubble is gone. Poof. Just like that.
The good news is that I will now be able to share my toddler experiences once again, only this time through older and hopefully, much wiser eyes.
It's a win/win situation. Going in as an experienced mother who truly appreciates the craziness of toddlers and the pleasures of play. Expect more reports. Inclusing how exhausting it is. I remember everything about it.
A good exhaustion. An exhaustion of hands-on involvement with a new generation. And hopefully, a feeling of a midlife crisis laid to rest.
Feel free to comment on either stage--post-college or toddlerhood. I'll be listening. And reading.
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