1. Kiss and Cuddle Continuously

 
Romance is likely what got you to the altar. Keeping it alive after you say your vows is vital. Take time each day for a little smooching and cuddling to keep that flame flickering. And set aside one evening a month for a real romantic rendezvous. That may be just what you need to take turn that flicker into a full blown forest fire!

2. Communicate your Concerns and Cares

 Keeping your worries to yourself not only stresses you out but can affect your marriage. Keep your worries, angers, and irritations bottled up long enough and eventually they’ll come spewing forth like Mount St. Helen. But gently let them out a little at a time and damage can be prevented. Allow each other the freedom to vent your frustrations, as well as communicate any other concerns, family-related or otherwise.  

 3. Presently Put the Past in its Place

I heard about a couple who went to a marriage counselor. The husband told he therapist that every time they fought, his wife became historical. The counselor frowned and said, “don’t you mean hysterical?” “No,” said the husband. “I mean historical. She brings up every single thing I’ve ever done!”

Disagreements in marriage are inevitable. But when you argue, keep the past where it belongs - behind you. No one likes to be attacked with something they did five months ago. If something from the past is bothering you, save it for another time when you can gently bring it up and discuss that issue. But, for now, putit in your pocket and focus on the issue at hand.

 4. Fantastic Fun as Friends and Family

 Families today get so caught up in their busy schedules that they forget how to have fun! And there’s nothing like an enjoyable time with each other and the kids to give your marriage a boost and to take your mind off the busyness of life. Go hiking or pack your picnic basket and hang out for an afternoon at a neighborhood park. Go to a video arcade, bowl a few games or attend a sporting event. Or maybe just order a pizza and dig out those board games. Schedule a “play date” at least once a month to keep the fun in your family.

 5. Look, Listen and Laugh!

 We’ve all heard how good laughter is for the soul…in fact, experts say laughter can actually make you live longer! This suggests, then, that laughter is sure to improve your marriage and family life, as well. After all, who can stay angry when experiencing the joy that laughter brings? Rent a funny movie. Go to a comedy club. Spend time reminiscing about the awkward dating days. Watch old videos of yourselves or your kids. Look and listen for funny moments and find something to laugh about!

     6. Remember to Respond with Respect

 There’s nothing that makes us more defensive than being spoken to unkindly. Yes, we need to give a little grace for a bad day (everyone has them!) but, really, there is no excuse for speaking to your spouse in a disrespectful or harsh way. Tame your tongue or bite it – whichever is easier for you - but discipline yourself to speak with love. Keep in mind it’s not just what you say, but how. Pay close attention to your tone of voice and ask yourself how you would react if spoken to in that way. Better yet, ask yourself if that’s how you would speak to a colleague or a good friend. Doesn’t your spouse deserve the same (or more) respect?

 7. The Sweet Sound of I’m Sorry

 When you do mess up (and you will!) be quick to say you’re sorry. Apologizing may not always be easy but it’s the fastest way to your spouse’s heart. Were you insensitive? Harsh? Inconsiderate? Selfish? Admitting it means you are taking responsibility for your actions and letting your spouse know you love them too much to allow them to be treated wrongly – even by you. Saying you’re sorry is putting your spouse’s feelings before your own.

 And really, isn’t that what marriage is all about?

 
Come up with some tongue twisters of your own for an easy way to remind yourselves of things you can do to keep your marriage in tip-top shape.

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