I have this amazing friend. She’s like a
mythical creature. The kind of person who can see through you. Do you know
someone who always has something kind to say about you before you can get out a
decent greeting? She is that kind of person.
I once was with her and we were walking into the YMCA
together. At the front desk was this grumpy old man. On this day he was
particularly cranky. The kind of ornery where you avert your eyes and pray that
he doesn’t see you kind of ornery. I did exactly that. But not Deana. Oh,
noooo. She practically assaulted the man attempting to reach over the counter
and through the partition in order to give him a hug?! A Hug? I was afraid he might
then hurt her. Instead…he began crying. Weeping. She could tell (with her x-ray
mind powers) that he was very upset, sad kind of upset, not just the usual
grumpy old man. (Which is of course all I saw).
He breaks down and begins a
very long story about how his wife was very ill, and had died 3 months ago to
the day. Yup, I’m the complete cow at this point. Plus, now I’m feeling all
weird cuz I don’t know what to do or say? I can’t bring myself to hoist on up
over the partition for a hug like she did. I manage instead to slither away off
to the emotional safety of the locker room, where no one talks to you no matter
how upset or ornery.
(Well, except for Deana, she talks to anyone, naked or not).
I usually describe her as my cheeky British friend,
and I do love her accent. She says things like ‘Oooh that would be lovely’,
when you’ve just asked her out to lunch. And she describes food as ‘gorgeous’.
And tea…well, that’s a given. We would have tea sampling nights at her house,
but I only came for the ‘Digestives’.
(I never failed to point out to her that in America
it’s funny to eat food named after the digestive tract).
But the most amazing thing about this fabulous friend
of mine is that when I first met her, she and her husband had already adopted
two children. And she made it clear to anyone she met that they were looking to
adopt more, 'God-willing'. (‘They don’t seem to be coming through me, but I
know they are out there’, is how she would express it.)
Their first child was
adopted through the foster care system in Arizona,
and the other child she ‘found’ through a friend who had a sister that was only
23 and on her 5th(!) child. This woman had nearly given up her 4th
child and Deana was able to work with her and make an agreement about a very
open adoption of this 5th child. Long story short. Deana was in the
delivery room, was the first to hold the baby, and within about 2 months (and
lots of hormones) was nursing (yes NURSING) that baby!
Fast forward a few years of her life, and two more
adopted children (another through foster care, and another through her church’s
adoption program) these last two under a year apart in age, she now had 4
children under the age of 5! Whoa. And since life likes to throw dirt clods at
you, within 2 months of adopting the 4th child, my friend was
pregnant herself. That would make 5 children under the age of 6. Oh my.
Oh did I mention her husband was finishing up med.
school at this point? Yes, MEDICALSCHOOL, as in
never see my husband kind of school. (Believe me, law school ain’t got nuthin’
on life in med. school). And what comes after med. school? That’s right. A
surgery residency. Think Grey’s Anatomy, without all the sex in the supply
closet, with 5(!) children. If she and the kids didn’t see him during med.
school, then he doesn’t EXIST during the residency.
Remember what I said about my friend being a mythical
creature? I wasn’t kidding. She is the onlyest person I’ve ever met, who could
possibly pull off what she does on a daily basis. She saves stray cats; she has
the heart of a giant, and apparently doesn’t need any real amount of sleep to
function! I just got off the phone with her Sunday night, and she told me she
can ‘feel’ 2 more children (at least!) out there. Now that is an amazing giant,
and a very real person.
Deana with her 4 oldest children. I think she is about
a month pregnant here.
What is my
point? My friend Deana doesn’t have enough on her plate. She is compiling a
book (a book?—I’m exhausted just typing her legend!) of adoption and foster
care stories. Besides her own fairy-tale story, she has assembled over 20 other
adoption and/or foster tales. And she would like to gather at least 50.
I am asking you if you have one (or to ask your
friends) if you/they would be willing to share their adoption story with her.
You can use my contact info, and I will forward it on to Deana.
Here is the letter she has
written:
Dearest
friends
I'm writing to you at this time to ask for
your help in writing and compiling a book on inspirational adoption stories.
As most of you know I have had some amazing experiences
myself. I am sharing my thoughts and feelings and the joys these children have brought.
I would like this book to be a bridge for those who feel hopelessness, sadness,
anger and confusion to take the leap of faith towards adoption, so they can
have the family they dream of. I hope this book will make a difference in many
peoples' lives through all of these amazing heartfelt stories.
I am also writing this for all of the
children in the world today who long for parents to hold them, read to them and
tuck them into bed and hear the words, "I love you!" These are God's
children just waiting to belong to a loving family.
These stories will clearly show God's love for all of us
and how His hand guides us. I am asking if you know anyone who has adopted, are
birth parents or who grew up as an adoptive child. Inviting them to share their
story would make such a difference.
These stories will be a comfort to others to safely walk
into the unknown joys of adoption.
For those of you who are adoptive parents
and know exactly what I am talking about, just pause for a moment and think
back to how you felt and the miracles that followed. I know everyone is busy
and time is precious. Please try to carve out a little time for this.
When this book is published a portion of the proceeds
will go to a non-profit organization benefiting children in need.
I believe in my heart that God knows his
children and He wants to bless us. It takes great faith to trust in His ways
and not ours. May God bless you and inspire you to share.