High School Attitude

So, what has been the biggest change in my son's behavior you might ask? Anger. Yes, I said anger. It seems like he is always angry at home all the time.  He used to be a happy go lucky child, but now he rarely has a smile on his face.  This concerns me terribly.  I have asked him why he feels this way and he really doesn't have an answer.  He just says he feels like he is always treated like a child by us.  The odd thing is we don't treat him any differently than we did two weeks ago before he started high school.

A few nights ago my son got grounded from his guitar.  He got mad at me because I asked him to get out of the car and check the mail and he hit the back of my seat as hard as he could.  My husband felt this was very disrespectful, so he grounded our son from his guitar for a week.  When we got home my son felt that if he went into a screaming, crying rage we might change our minds and drop his grounding. 

He screamed at me and said he was not treated like he was on our level.  Well, I'm sorry but if he'd act like he was on our level and be more respectful towards us he would get treated that way.  Perhaps I'm a little too old fashioned, but I feel a 14 year old should be mature enough to treat his parents and younger sister with respect.  Instead he wants to walk around barking off orders to his sister, but far be it for me to tell him to do something.  Needless to say, he's still grounded.

Another thing that doesn't make sense is that this behavior is so out of character for my son.  He is extremely intelligent and is in all Honors classes at school.  We have always been very close and could make each other laugh over the silliest of things.  We have a close family and there's never been this much drama and anger in our household before.  I just wish this black cloud that is over us would sail right on by.

This has really gotten me concerned about my son.  I have tried talking to him and told him that if there's anything I can do to get things back the way they were I will.  I love both my kids dearly and would walk through fire for them.  I just don't feel I should be treated this way just because I expect my son to continue doing his chores. 

It seems like these outbursts he has are always triggered when I ask him to take care of the animals, sack the garbage, pick up his room, etc.  I am hoping this is a phase he is going through because I do not want to spend the last few years before he becomes an adult fighting all the time.  My family is the most important thing in my life and if it continues we may need to seek some sort of counseling.