Quiet Kids! Mommy's Looking For a Job!

I just found out two weeks ago that my job is being eliminated at the end of the year. Mind you, this is not just any job - it is my dream job and I love everything about it: my boss, my coworkers, the office itself, etc.  So, aside from trying to get over the emotional trauma of being pushed from the nest prematurely, I am in the middle of a job hunt in what can most politely be called a crappy economy.

Add to my panic the fact that I am the mother of a little girl who goes to an expensive but fabulous preschool. She's happy there and she's learning a lot, so pulling her out of school when this job ends is unthinkable. While Hubs is starting a new job this week, we still need two incomes in order to afford certain luxuries like rent, food, daycare, utilities, and gas for the cars, so you can understand why I've been a bit stressed out the last couple of weeks as I have scrambled to re-write my resume, contact everyone in my professional network, and send out online applications in impressive quantities.  I will have a new job before this one ends. Period.

Meanwhile, Hubs has been terrific and supportive and everything a husband is supposed to be when his wife is going through something difficult.  However, my own self worth is dwindling by the day. I go into meetings and mentally plead with my boss, "why didn't you fight harder to keep me?" Truth be told, I know he has nothing to do with it. This is strictly budget-related, but it's still painful.

On the upside, this move gives me yet another shot at reinvention. What personal brand do I wish to develop for myself? Who and what do I want to be when I grow up? I have to remind myself to keep my eyes on the prize, so to speak, rather than getting sucked into a vortex of ickiness. Being stressed out about money and self-worth are hard enough, which makes it that much harder to be a good mother, let alone a wife or a friend.  I'm learning to budget my time so that I'm present in the time I am spending with Hubs and the kids, rather than being there for them half-heartedly, while spending every other waking moment on the computer, emailing and sending resumes. It means delegating household chores and deciding which ones can wait. And it means learning to cook in bigger quantities, so I can either freeze portions for future use or get creative with leftovers, thus ultimately carving out some free time for the task at hand: finding work.

More than anything, this transitional period is teaching me that I am not defined by my job. It is merely one piece of several layers that make up my entirety. I have been through a few other careers before and I am sure that I will find the next right job.  

So, for those of you who are unemployed or facing potential unemployment, how are you dealing with it? How is your self-esteem? Any wisdom you'd like to share?