Heartbreak Hotel When Your Boomeranger Flies Off

"They" say that home is where the heart is.

Well, after a week of emotional upheaval, physical disasters, my heart is now divided between LA and Portland.

My Booomeranger is gone, baby, gone.

Although I have been castigated for using my real kids' names in the past, I have one of each gender and they have brought great joy and plenty of upheaval during their formative years.

Post-formative years were the real challenge. You'll see.

Formative years pretty much end around age 8. As far as your parental influence is concerned.

If you've done your job right, all the morals, character and social  consciousness-raising have been ingrained.

After that, it's a matter of refining and re-defining the world through a growing child's radar. Oh, you'll never cease to be important in their lives, but you'd best prepare early on for the first leaving. It rips your heart out. Yep, even the strongest of us. But that's part of the process. You'll live.

And if you did your job right, you will be proud of your kids and know that you have at least added some decent people to the sea of humanity.

But letting go doesn't make it any easier. Think that first day of kindergarten was rough?

 Wait until you have one kid in a faraway city, sick with Mono and another kid who has left you after living with for seven months.

And you've made a huge move and have no real friends and a freelance writing "job" that requires isolation and thinking.

Sorry, I drifted...a common state I find myself in lately since my boomeranger left...again.

Lately, I've been thinking alot about-- what do I want to do now that the kids are gone?

After all, I started freelancing so I would always be there for them after school, since I had a mother who worked long hours and was rarely around. Now we have moved from New York to Tucson and I feel lost.

So this is not my typical cynical post. It's the real deal. I miss my kids. My husband is laid up with a bad back and I am tired of my own pity party.

Having adult kids is our constant reminder that we (hopefully) have produced responsible grown-ups who will always strive to do the right thing.

Any suggestions about how to deal with loneliness post-boomeranger? I'm listening.